Day 102

I’m looking forward to getting back to waking up and reading my book first thing, but that wasn’t happening this morning, and I doubt it will happen tomorrow, or Wednesday either, but that’s my issue to deal with, and I will deal with it when things settle down on Wednesday. 

Instead, today, I woke up at 9.47AM after doing to bed after midnight. I can only say that it’s getting used to the anti-depressants again that is making me so tired and emotional lately.

I make tea, but not food because I just don’t feel like eating yet. This may come back to haunt me, and I must remember everything that I’ve said in recent weeks about the importance of sticking to a routine.

I will stick to a routine, but for today, I’m more interested in getting up and getting things done. I can, and will, get on course this week. I am determined, and it starts right now this second.

I spend the first forty minutes waking up, transferring notes from my phone to yesterday’s journal and checking Twitter. It occurs to me that I could have used those 40 minutes to make breakfast or read a book, so no more messing about now.

I write my daily TDL and get on with it.


I write in my gratitude journal about how I’m grateful just to be safe today, to have the ground below me and the walls to contain me and protect me. As long as I am safe today, I am free, and I can achieve anything.

I write this because I do not feel grounded today. I feel like my body is being pulled back by invisible strings so that my soul can escape.

I’m no sure if that’s a good thing or not, but it certainly doesn’t feel good, so I search for a grounding meditation, and do that next.

I found the music on this one to be a little too loud so that it was distracting, but otherwise it was a good meditation that does the job.


I do a quick blast of my kettle bell routine, but today I mostly focus on pilates exercises, knee-rolls and bridges.

Then I get a quick shower, brush my teeth, and have a shave. I am going to save my anti-depressant until later on in the day so that I can get some work done before the fatigue hits.

Admittedly, I do feel a lot better after that.


My first task on the list to get my flat ready for inspection tomorrow is to take my laundry down to my parents. I do that, put it on a two hour wash and let the dog out, then I come back and set a reminder on my phone to go and get it.


I finally get round to making the spinach and onion omelette I should have had this morning.

Whilst I’m doing that, I put the dishes on to soak, and set a reminder on my phone to go and wash them in 25 minutes.

12.12PM – WORK

I’ve got two articles to finish today, and a total of five to proof read, edit, and send, I can get this done in a couple of hours easily.

My soundtrack today is this Thievery Corporation mix.

As a distracted start, I get going and finish one article pretty easily. Just one more to go then, but first, I’m going to get those dishes washed.


I got that done quickly and set another load on to soak – yes, somehow I’ve amassed a lot of dishes.


One more article to write, and five to proof read. This should be easy. I get half the article done – or at least the majority of the introduction – and just have to write the rest once I’m done with Dishes Part 2.


That’s the majority of them done, and just my porridge pan to go.


I head to my parents, hang my laundry out to dry, and also put my kitchen mat into be washed.

Then I head back for the final blast of work.

2.43PM – WORK

I’m going to try and get all this work done and delivered before 4PM – let’s see if I succeed.

I finished a little after four, but only because I kept getting distracted by this awesome Thievery Corporation live show.

All the work is finished and delivered, and that’s my first weekly goal completed.


I’ve been promising myself all day that if I just got everything done, I could have one quick go on the PlayStation as a short reward before finishing off everything else that I have to do today.


I’ve been working on new posts for my writing portfolio blog, typically whilst I’ve been waiting for appointments, been on the bus, or otherwise had a few moments to spend, so, for the sake of adding to my word total this week, I decide that now is a good time to upload at least one of them.

That was a quick and easy little win, but I realise that I’m starting to get majorly hungry, so it’s time to wrap up and make dinner before spending the evening tidying up.


I make my usual veggie curry and sweet potato then sit down to watch TV for a while and just rest whilst eating.

7.05PM – TIDY UP

I set an alarm for one hour and tell myself to tidy up in that time, and I do.

I get the kitchen looking flawless, and do some work in cleaning the bedroom, bathroom and hallway, all of which can be finished tomorrow morning. I am absolutely not worried about this flat inspection tomorrow.

After finishing the cleaning, I head over to the shop to buy milk before doing my final task of the day.


It feels like I’ve been doing this for a long time, and yet I’ve still got quite a bit to do. I’m determined to get all this finished by the end of the week so I spend a couple of hours on it, and actually make some good progress.


That’s my day over with now. It’s time for me to enjoy a bowl of porridge as something of a reward for getting everything done off my list, sitting back to fall asleep and watch some TV, and call it a day.


Today started badly because I overslept for so long, but I managed to pull it back and find my discipline from somewhere. In the end, I got done everything that I wanted to get done, and go to bed today feeling excited about this week and the possibility of having a perfect 10/10, 50/50 week.

I’m realising more and more today that there are certain things I do that are just not working for me. Clearly I am not where I want to be in my life, and changes have to be made.

Those changes start this week. They start today, and they carry on tomorrow.

Tomorrow is another day.


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