Day 77

I probably fell asleep around 1am last night, and woke up at 6.30AM thinking that I was feeling awake, but then falling back asleep until 8.17AM.

From there, I did the same thing I do every morning; I went into the kitchen and immediately got started on an omelette, tea, and hot water bottle.

My back is really stiff and sore this morning, worse than it has been for a long time. I take painkillers, then sit and eat breakfast whilst catching up with a few websites and Twitter accounts.


My gratitude journal today isn’t much of a gratitude journal at all, but more of a reaffirmation that I have it within me to do, have, and achieve everything I have ever wanted.

I realise that because today is June 1st, I have precisely 30 days to achieve all of my monthly goals and targets. This is entirely doable, and I’m looking forward to doing it.


My main goal today is to clean out my over-crowded work inbox, go through emails, and find payment details that I agreed with my client last year. This is probably going to take a while, and I’ve blocked off the morning for it.

I’m only starting now because I still have a fresh hot cup of tea and I’d rather not rush it whilst doing other things, so I can sit and sip it at my desk whilst getting on with the email clean.

During this first period, I spend the time unsubscribing from mailing lists, deleting all the junk, and deleting all emails from the guy who sends me the social media posts to proof, because I know there’s nothing useful in there.

Whilst I’m doing that, I realise that after I sent a quick job to a client yesterday, he first OK’d it, then asked me to change it within like five minutes, so I’ll have to do that once I get back from taking my laundry to be done.


I shower, shave, brush teeth, and get dressed then I’m ready to head out.

Before I do that, i grab one of the empty greetings cards I keep just for occasions like now, and I write Ruth a get-well card.


I get the laundry on, let the dog out, and borrow a stamp, which I then use to post the letter.

Then I head back to base to carry on with work.


Before I can get on with emails, I first need to quickly take care of this description writing exercise.

I got most of the inbox clean but still couldn’t find what I was looking for.

The basic gist here is that I got a job with a third party through my regular client, and got paid in full, without my regular client getting paid a percentage of the money. So, obviously they need to make a profit, but neither of us could find any mention of how much profit they should make.

So I just had to email and say “let’s come to an agreement,” but given that things are not financially perfect right now, I also had to include a few paragraphs which just made me sick to my stomach to right.

As a personal favour, could I please ask that any reductions in monthly billing are done in installments, such as a percentage off each month’s total? Or if it needs to be done in full, possibly delayed by one month?
I happily devote much of my time as a freelancer to XX projects and certainly appreciate you continuing to work with me for your copywriting needs, however I’m sure you can appreciate the challenges in generating a minimal income. With a few personal challenges to overcome in the past few months, I would greatly appreciate still being able to raise an invoice for a percentage of the work completed. 
If not, I will also understand and continue to value your business.

Ugh, I hated sending that, but now that it is over, I no longer need worry about it.


I’ve still got one client job left to do this week, but honestly, I feel right now that I just need to do something different, even if it’s just for an hour or two. I’m tired this morning. More tired than I thought I would be, so if I’m up to it, I can always start working on client projects after an afternoon nap.

For now, I’m going to commit to writing portfolio blog content until at least 12.30PM.

I get one blog finished off for 930 words, but then I’m hungry, so I head into the kitchen to make lunch.


I mix up a few small pieces of chicken with some kale, carrots, green beans and a few bits of broccoli and cauliflower. I also get my first pint glass of water of the day. Then I sit down to just start another blog post because the idea for an introduction is in my head, and I don’t want to lose it.

So I write that whilst eating lunch.


I’m still tired, but I figure if I do this, then I come back and I can take a nap before getting some more work done.

There is no room to hang my laundry out at my parents, so I bring it home and put it out to dry here.

1.43PM – NAP

Honestly, I think it’s stress and worry that makes me more tired than Anything to do with diet, lifestyle, or even hard work. Even still, I know I need a nap to reboot, so I crash, and I end up falling into one of those wonderfully comfortable deep dozes that I wish I could keep going for longer.

Alas, there is stuff to do today.


I wake up, grab tea, and use the first couple of minutes of my post-nap time just to wake up.


Discipline: Sacrificing the things you want now for the thing you want the most.

Thing I want now: Not to be working on these construction industry articles

Things I want the most: To be financially stable again.

To force myself to do it, I decide that I am just going to push on until 5.30PM and then stop, and that I can use this afternoon mostly to plan my articles to make them easier to finish tomorrow.

Soundtrack for this work is this Deep Focus playlist from Spotify.

As I’m working, I feel compelled to mention that I just discovered that I share a last name with one of the pioneers of the Quantity Surveying industry. Maybe I only got this job because we share a last name?

I spend two hours and fourteen minutes getting the introductions finished to three articles, with two of those planned out fully.

I will work on those more tomorrow, but for now I still want to shower and eat before I cycle to the meeting, so I clock off, having done a total of just three hours and 37 minutes for today.


I’m hot and sweaty and very much looking forward to this shower.

I shave, brush teeth, and spend a long time in the shower, really indulging. I feel infinitely better for it.


It’s still the week, so it’s still sweet potato and veggie curry night, then I sit down to watch one episode of TV whilst eating dinner, before getting dressed and heading out the door.


I get onto the canal via the flash and head out the wrong way to clock up some extra miles before cycling to the 12 Step meeting.

2017-06-01 19.06.40-2

I’m glad to see everybody there, but I get a bad vibe from that meeting, as I do sometimes, so I leave at half time when everybody stops for tea, coffee, and a smoke.

On the way home, I stop at the supermarket to buy a new razor. I’m hungry, so I also grab a protein bar, so I eat that to keep me going.


I get home, unload my bag and grab my second pint glass of water for the day. I know, that’s nowhere near enough.

I spend some time reading this Guardian article about mixtapes because the blog I’m going to write tonight starts off talking about mixtapes.

I also update this journal, and then get on with what I’m doing.


I’ve decided that I’m going to work on writing portfolio blogs up to 10PM this evening, no matter how much, or how little that gets me done.

I only manage to get one post done, and that takes me to 10.15PM. It is 744 words, which, when added to the 930 I did earlier, gives me a total for the day of 1674.

10.15PM – TIDY UP

I’m getting hungry again, and tired, so I am soon going to make some porridge and crash out for the evening, but first I want to make sure that I do my “practicality” goal for the day and actually spend some time tidying up, so at 10.17PM I set a 30 minute timer and get to work on tidying up in that time.


I grab a small bowl of porridge, sit down to watch TV with it, and promptly fall asleep I’m guessing sometime around midnight.


I found today challenging and scary. I hated sending that email about payment and it has been bothering me ever since. I think it will continue to bother me until I hear something. All I can do until then, realistically, is keep moving forward, putting one foot in front of the other and trusting that the universe will provide for me.

The universe is going to provide for me. The universe is going to provide for me.

I just have to keep going. I will keep going tomorrow.

Tomorrow is another day.


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