Day 24

I woke up at 8.15AM after a decent but not great night’s sleep. I remember waking up a few times last night, and that disturbed things, but for the most part, I’m doing OK. 

I take a few minutes to message Sam, make tea, and catch up with things by reading Twitter on my computer. Then, by 8.38am I’m ready to get started.

8.38AM – GRATITUDE AND MEDITATION

Today I do a different meditation, one I’d totally forgotten about but had in my bookmarks. It’s this one:

 

Honestly, I think that’s awesome, and it’s probably the best five minute meditation I’ve done for a long time.

8.53AM – FINISH CLEANING KITCHEN

Dad text me late last night to say that he’d found somebody to come and take that shitty old fridge away after I got the new one a few weeks ago.

My kitchen is clean, but it still needs a bit of a sweep, and given that I never know how early Dad is going to ring me and say he’ll be here in five minutes, I decide that getting that done should be my next priority.

I also need to give that fridge a bit of a wipe down because it’s become all mouldy and shitty. Yuck.

That goes straight forward, and also gives me chance to put the bins and recycling out.

It doesn’t take as long as I thought, but I do a thorough job, and I’m happy with it.

9.56AM – ADD PEARL JAM TO ALBUMS LIST

I mentioned on Day 9 of this blog how I document the movies and music I indulge in, and so, after listening to Pearl Jam’s Riot Act every time I’m in the kitchen for any length of time since Day 17, I figure it’s time to document that and move on to something else.

 

This also gives me the chance to do a couple of quick updates to things which, in the grand scheme of things, don’t matter much, but which do to me. These include:

  • Updating the Spotify playlist I keep of all my favourite tracks from the albums I listen to
  • Linking to this month’s goals from the homepage of the blog I use to track goals.

10.34AM – BACKSTRETCHES, TAI CHI, MEDS AND SHOWER

I still haven’t done this yet, and it’s important, so let’s get to it.

All the important health and hygiene stuff is finally taken care of, and it occurs to me that I probably shouldn’t be leaving showering and brushing my teeth until so late in the day.

Hopefully in time I can work out a new routine and start doing these things earlier in the morning.

11.09AM – MAKE BREAKFAST

I forgot I had some crumpets left, so I make these for breakfast, and spend a few minutes killing time on Twitter. There’s still plenty of stuff to be done today but I’m not rushing.

11.31AM – GET SET UP FOR WORK

I’ve got a full cup of hot tea here, so I’m going to finish this off whilst getting set up for the one work task I need to do, and also whilst listening to the awesome Astral Weeks by Van Morrison.

I’m frustrated, because I think it’s going to be a simple process, but the client has completly destroyed the article by trying a new process that he doesn’t fully understand.

It means the article makes for terribly awkward, poor reading. I’m going to have to rewrite the whole fucking article.

Weirdly, I feel like crying.

I’m going to take a walk and go to my parents to pick up my washing before this affects my mood too badly.

I think Dad’s forgotten about picking up the refrigerator too.

Fuck. OK, this isn’t the end of the world.  I can deal with this.

Time to start again.

12NOON – GO TO PARENTS

I’m not sure there’s anybody home, so I just go in, pick up my laundry, and head straight back out again, all the while seething about this client that I can’t let go no matter how much I want to today.

12.23PM – BACK TO WORK

I’ve decided the only thing for it is to literally start this article from scratch, cutting and pasting as much as I can from the client’s original document and trying to make some sense of it.

That’s not going to be easy, but let’s give it a shot.

1.12PM – NAP

After less than an hour of trying to get my head around this stupid article, I find that the brain fog is on me hard, so I give up for the day and go lie down.

I don’t get much of a nap today though because I’m woken up by Dad calling me to say he’s coming to get rid of the old fridge out of my kitchen.

1.48PM – MOVE FRIDGE

Though I’m glad to be rid of the frdige, this is a disaster. Some kind of filth spills from the back of it, splashes all over the communal (carpeted) stairway in my building and makes a stink that is just foul as hell (UPDATED A WEEK LATER) and stinks the entire place out for over a week.

1.57PM – BACK TO WORK

I take the time to get back to work and this time find that -even though this article still sucks- I manage to get from start to finish with it and do a good job of turning it into something I think my client is going to be happy with.

3.15PM – WORK ON HOBBY BLOG

With that done, I make some food and sit down to work on my hobby blog until Sam calls.

3.45PM – SAM TIME

She’s not feeling great today, and is stressed out to the max. I don’t help things, and I feel terrible about it.

Eventually she goes to lie down whilst I get ready to go to the meeting.

6.30PM – CYCLE TO MEETING

As I’m cycling to the meeting I get a message from Sam to say that she’s in so much pain and so ill that she’s going to hospital. Now I feel like shit, but this isn’t about me. I am worried to death for her.

7PM – MEETING

For the full 90 minute AA meeting I just want to jump out of my seat and go tot he hospital, but I know I got things to do here, so I stick with it and try my best just to chair the meeting like I’m supposed to.

I’m so glad when it’s over.

8.30PM – GRAB SNACKS FROM CO-OP

I rush out of the meeting, run to the supermarket next door and grab a few things to eat, then head back to help tidy up the meeting and get out of there as soon as I possibly can.

8.45PM – CYCLE HOME

I rush home, still feeling like shit. My depression is terrible today.

9.10PM – WATCH TV

Sam is still in hospital and there’s no word from her, so I do the only thing I can and crash in front of Netflix for the evening, eating and eventually falling asleep.

MIDNIGHT – SLEEP

I finally hear from Sam, tell her I love her, and give her a kiss. Then I go to sleep.

REFLECTIONS ON TODAY

That was by far the worst day I’ve had in a long time. I hated almost every moment of it and I’m so glad it’s over. Here’s to -hopefully- a better day tomorrow.

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